Living with Psoriatic Arthritis (PsA)

How do others cope with the disbelievers!

I’m a ‘lasher out’ personality type just anyway. Overly assertive at times. But in the throes of the uncontrolled pain of PsA, I certainly hid away, never answered the phone or responded to anyone much at all.

Actually it was joining this forum that got me communicating more and doing it more agreeably too. That and the fact at the same time I was dealing with a young puppy who needed me to able to look after him properly and help him learn how to deal with the world so he loved it and it loved him.:dog:

1 Like

AAlso called “Over-focused”, I like the “lasher out” better. We have the biggest “lasher out” events during the Christmas season! Last year, I just took a retreat two weeks before Christmas, no presents for anyone, just slept in! Christmas is a big deal in the monastery, a lot of events, but always the same, so it was nice to skip it. Any deadline stress will flare the ADD. Those poor receptionists and ladies at the pharmacy, and 90 year old drivers on a two lane road! I suddenly become “Mad Max” “Escape from Thunderdome”…
When it gets like this, you have to have seclusion and time to suss it all out. Online groups like this are the best for support and fairly safe venting.
BTW two of our 3 cats at the farm died today, leaving only Buster. One from old age, the other from a absessed tooth infection.

1 Like

Oh poor kitties. That’s so sad. I loved your most recent picture of Buster. He’s looking good.

My two cats died of old age one last summer and one the previous summer. But not before they totally dominated the puppy. They’d gang up on him and then beat him up. He remains very wary of cats consequently. I miss them lots, though. I miss seeing how cats deal with the world. I love their attitude to life just generally. Sassy, opinionated and everything mostly is on their terms. Never fails to make me smile.

I will get more sometime. But thought the dog needed the break for now.

1 Like

I am sitting at my desk (at work) crying as I read this. YES! YES! YES! Someone else understands.

I am so weary of everything hurting. I’m weary of limping and walking like I’m a hundred years old! I hate that I gain so much weight because I can’t exercise like I should. I hate that NAP is my favorite word and all I want to do when I get home from work is fall apart. I hate the look on my husband’s face when I say that I hurt too badly to walk the dogs or do the housework.

All this to say Thank YOU for voicing my feelings.

Praying you and all of us feel better!


So where are you at on the meds regime now? I assume you’ve moved on besides just taking mxt? I so hope so.:hugs:

1 Like

This is interesting Jon. I feel the pull to seclusion when dealing with my health state. I have a family so I do enjoy being with them and find overall that I am happier when engaging my close relationships. However, that does not include public spaces with lots of people. I become uncomfortable around others particularly when doing worse than normal. It is like dropping everything for self preservation.


What s up? Hope you are getting along and progressing w fixing whatever it is.

1 Like


That’s the best!

1 Like

I was contacted via email by an old work colleague and we have been catch up with news - it’s been about seven years. And the inevitable happened. It always happens:

I have psoriatic arthritis and bipolar disorder. I have had the arthritis for five years and the bipolar for nearly twenty-five years. The most annoying thing in both cases is someone finding out this info and saying:

“Keep active”
“Have you tried cod liver oil? That will help.”
“Keep smiling”
Yes, I get trouble with my knees too - I can only do five mile walks now."


  1. They don’t have the condition, so don’t give advice.
  2. They’re not doctors or the experts.
  3. I’m not an idiot.
  4. Such comments are bloody patronising!

LOL Right on. I once had a colleague tell me that he knew about arthritis: he had it in his little toe and that thing had ruined his golf swing.

Good thing I didn’t swing.


1 Like

It’s ‘funny’ (NOT) people say such things with a straight face, like seriously?
They may even say them with the best of intent, but, like seriously?
Some think they know. They don’t
Some think they’re being helpful. They’re not.

I have a niece, she has a brain condition, that has required surgeries and she works.
I too have a brain condition which has required surgeries and I can’t work. She has a partner who can be a bit of a chauvinistic @#$%& and is forever making snide little comments.

I was having a BAD day with pain, with a killer headache. Her partner came out with “she can, so why can’t you” line. This bloke has 100kg on me but I truly wanted to snot him, smack him right in the mouth, arrogant sod. So I bite my tongue (hard) and walk away.
A month later he’s off of work due to gout, so I use his own line back on him “she can, so why can’t you”. You could see the temperature rising, he’s gone all red in the face with rage. “It’s not nice is it Mike, remember last month, you wanted to give me hell for something I have no control over. Well back at you mate. Remember this cos I’ll be reminding you again the next time you want to make a smartarse comment regarding something you have no clue about”
Surprise, surprise, he hasn’t made a comment since.
Now, this is an example of ‘enough is enough’ and I’d had enough of his opinions, but I must admit I’ve lost count of how often I’ve just had to smile, nod and walk away before I say (or do) the wrong thing due to ignorant/arrogant people. For those of us with invisible/rare conditions it truly is NOT uncommon.

Merl from the Moderator Support Team.


Wish I’d been there Merl!

There are some who, in order to avoid being smacked in the teeth, simply leave a copy of ‘Treating Arthritis - More Ways to a Drug-Free Life’ for me to find when they’ve left. I put it in the bin.

1 Like

Oh yes. I’ve had the “have you tried green tea” people, too.

And variations on that, like “have you tried going outside, stripping naked, dancing a jig, shoving a nettle up your backside and pledging allegiance to aliens? My Gran swore by it. She’s dead now.”


Tumeric, I’m truly sick of hearing about tumeric. And apple cider vinegar.

1 Like

Ah the old Turmeric. Nothing wrong with it, quite like a curry myself.

I suspect one day in 100 years they’ll be talking about pre-arthritis like they talk about pre-diabetes, and Turmeric, along with fish oil and other lifestyle changes, might help some people to claw back in the opposite direction to fully fledged autoimmune response.

For those of us who’ve had our epigenetic switches already flicked though, I rather think Turmeric is a bit how one of our members described the effect of plaquenil for her - a bit like using a water pistol on a forest fire (apologies to the member if I got it wrong, and of course because I’ve also forgotten who it was, but thankyou because it it gave me such a laugh and has always stuck in my head as such a great retort that I think, but never give, when someone is giving me free advice again!)


‘She’ll’ be hopping mad, I’m pretty sure it was tntlamb. Really great analogy isn’t it? I often think of it too. No harm in minimal interventions, though so important to realise that minimal is all they are.

@darinfan, don’t diss sticking a nettle up the backside, everyone knows that works a treat!

1 Like

Speaking of Forrest Fires, Just a heads up DO NOT was your tumeric down with apple cider vinegar…


Been there. I got to the point that when somebody starts suggesting cures and advice I break in and stop them. Tell them I’ve heard it all, spell out psa and send them to WebMD.